Black Girl Magic; Why It Is Not Just A Hashtag

     Growing up with a darker skin complexion, Confidence was not handed to me on a silver spoon. In my introduction blog, I spoke about being bullied for being a foreigner with an accent and called ugly as well for all of primary school and junior high school. What makes my story even more interesting is that it was my fellow black brothers and sisters that did the bullying. As humans, we constantly project our own fears and insecurities on other individuals but in actual reality. How we treat and view others is how we treat and view ourselves. So, I don’t hold any grudges to those that to the bullying but when you are constantly called ugly at a young age and picked on, you start to believe the lies that are fed to you. I recall watching shows on Disney channel and movies like legally blonde, high school musical, Hannah Montana and asking myself. “Why did I have to be black?” “Why can’t I be white?” and “Why are all of these white people considered pretty and beautiful and I wasn’t?” Of course, there were shows like That so raven and movies including the Princess and the frog that included people of color but those shows never addressed the insecurities of a little brown skinned girl who just wanted to be considered pretty, not even beautiful, beautiful was on a completely different level.
      I believe I remember at the age of 13, I stood outside at the end of church service, waiting for my father who was still alive at the time to come out so we can leave, and an older woman walked by. She stopped, looked at me and said, “you are so pretty” and walked away. That was the first time in my entire life that I was called pretty. I thought to myself “yeah right, sure” sarcastically. Looking back to that memory and my thought process, I had no confidence at all, what so ever.
        Perming the natural hair was extremely popular back in the early 2000s. Perming is the act of adding chemicals to natural hair in order to turn curly hair into straight hair, permanently. Kids at school would also make fun of me for not perming my hair and for always dividing it in two or just leaving it “out”.  When I moved to America, throughout my years in middle school up until I graduated high school, I have always worn braids. I never ever once let anyone see my natural hair. I can write and tell you the reason I didn’t allow or want anyone to see my natural hair was that it was damaged and struggling but that would be a lie. I didn’t want anyone to see my hair in its natural state because I didn’t think it was beautiful enough to be viewed at that state. Going to the pool was out of the question if my hair weren’t in braids. I jumped from braids to braids in order to hide my natural hair. When I graduated high school, I began flat ironing my natural hair to avoid the weird stares that I would receive for wearing my hair natural.
        On September 2017, I was taking out tracks from a sew in and was struggling with removing the thread. I didn’t want to cut my natural hair on accident.  In an act of frustration of how much damaged my hair was from the constant heat of the flat iron, I let go of all the care in the world and began to cut my natural hair off along with the sew in. Today, I wear the braids for the right reasons.  Braids were created to allow colored people’s natural hair to grow in a healthy and easy to manage way. The style and fashion are a plus.
       I would be lying if I said that I don’t struggle with confidence any longer. Confidence is still a milestone in its own, but I will say that I have came a long way from where I was at a few years ago. I will give credit where it’s due and that will be to the countless black women who fight every day for black culture to be praised and not looked down on any longer. Black Girl Magic is a term that was recently created to not only empower black women but always little black girls. It is not just a hashtag or something to be taken lightly, you know how much power it holds due to my story.  We have come a long way as a society, but we still have much more to go.
My Black Girl Magic Masterpeice

Another piece made along with my friend Savannah and held by other my friend Ahquasia

Black Girl Magic comes in all shapes, sizes and looks.

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